The Constitution is the bedrock of American democracy, as is also the case with state laws and their constitutions. Without these laws, the United States would cease to exist as a nation. So believe us, we really love the law of the land.
However, while we respect these laws, we feel that it is perfectly acceptable to also – at the same time – acknowledge the fact that a lot of the laws in there are either antiquated or incredibly stupid. From weird and slightly strange laws, to those that are bizarre and downright idiotic, there are plenty of stupid laws that ought to be gently scratched out of the national and state constitutions.
After all, the laws of the land need to evolve with the times and cast out stupid laws in the US that simply shouldn’t exist anymore. But as frustrating as some of these laws can be, a lot of them are quite harmless and make for hilarious reading before they hopefully get scrapped someday. The strangest American laws also say a lot about the times in which they were written, giving us a glimpse into the thought process of the founding fathers.
1. You can’t drive blindfolded in Alabama
Oh yes, we have plenty of questions about this weird law in the US too. For instance, why would you even want to drive blindfolded anywhere in the world anyway? Did someone actually try driving blindfolded in Alabama? Why did the lawmakers actually think this was worth investing time and effort into drafting? Does this mean that it’s legal to drive blindfolded elsewhere in the United States? This is one of those weird state laws that leaves us asking so many questions, but at the end of the day, it’s just a harmless oddity in the books. And if you’re the kind who would actually want to drive blindfolded, it’s probably for the better that it’s illegal in Alabama.
2. Donkeys can’t sleep in bathtubs in Arizona
The peculiar story behind this law is one worth knowing, not because it’s a great story but one of the weirdest reasons for a law to be written that you’ve ever heard. It is said that in the 1920s, a rancher’s donkey had gotten accustomed to sleeping in his bathtub. One fateful day, a dam broke and flooded the rancher’s house. The donkey, who was relaxing in the tub with a glass of bubbly, was whisked away by the floods and had to be rescued by rescue officials.
It is believed that this incident is the reason why a law was then enacted which states that donkeys can’t sleep in the bathtub in Arizona. In another twist to one of the strangest American laws, it is perfectly acceptable for a donkey to stand in your bathtub. The law continues to exist on paper even today, so now you know that your ex technically commits a crime every time they use the bathtub. Do with that what you will.
3. Pickles must be bouncy in Connecticut
Here’s a weird law in the US about pickles that tickles us silly. Honestly, though, there was a time when this bizarre, unscientific, strange American law really did put the farmers of Connecticut in quite a pickle – in fact, two farmers were even arrested in 1948 for selling pickles that didn’t bounce, after which all their perfectly legitimate pickles were destroyed.
It is believed that this rule was written into law because officials had no idea about how to evaluate the quality of a pickle without tasting it. Yet, how they gathered that a pickle’s bounciness was the best measure of its quality will always be one of life’s mysteries that we’ll never be able to wrap our heads around. One of the weirdest laws in the US to exist indeed – just thinking about the number of pickles that have gone to waste makes us feel saltier about this law than pickle brine.
4. You can’t throw bricks onto a highway in Iowa
Have you ever felt so frustrated after a long, hard day at work that you just need to throw a brick onto a highway to vent out your frustration? Yeah, we haven’t either.
But clearly, this had to have been a problem for Iowans at some point of time if it still exists in the state’s laws. We can only wonder how big of a problem it might have been, and why people did it. Or maybe they just wanted to be on the safe side, in case the idea did cross someone’s mind. This is one of the strangest American laws, and we want to know why it exists.
Perhaps if there’s something we’re more curious about than this weirdest of laws itself, it is the law’s only exception. If you really, really, really want to throw a brick onto the highway in Iowa, the good news is that you still can! You just need to ask nicely and get written permission from the City Council.
5. Tire screeching is banned in Kansas
After reading about some of the weirdest laws in the US, this law is one that we could get behind a little more easily than we’d care to admit. Let’s face it, tire screeching is seriously annoying and people need to stop pretending that it’s still cool. We’re totally for keeping noise levels down to a minimum and not using the road as an opportunity for one to showboat and let the world know that they have a nice car. It’s about time that people started driving a little more safely.
So that’s that – your tires are not allowed to screech, because you could be charged with breaking the peace according to the letter of Kansas state law. Perhaps it sounds a little extreme, but we can understand the intent behind this law completely. This is one of the rare examples of weird laws in the US you find that sound completely stupid, but aren’t really the strangest American laws in spirit.
6. It is illegal to eat fried chicken with cutlery in Georgia
In 1961, the law makers in Gainesville thought that it would be a smart idea to use the law of the land as a tool to gain publicity in the small town. That’s when they passed a law to really create headlines – they outlawed eating their fried chicken with anything but your hand. As people of culture, even we’d agree that that’s the best way to eat fried chicken. What makes no sense is that this is a law. Perhaps the legislature could’ve written an Op-Ed instead?
In one of the rarely seen cute, endearing ways in which the letter of the law has been enforced, a woman was ‘arrested’ on her 91st birthday for eating fried chicken with a knife and fork. The hilarious celebration that was a part of her birthday celebrations saw both the woman and the Police Chief laughing along with her friends as her ‘citation’ was read out.
7. You can be fined for swearing in public in Maryland
Here’s one of those weird laws in the US that makes you want to break it the moment you hear it even exists. When you look at some people, you just know that their mouths ought to have been washed out with soap when they were younger – but that doesn’t mean we ought to punish them for not doing so, right?
Well, the law in Maryland is what it fudging is – with a $100 fine for a misdemeanor charge. Think of all the helpless folk who’d be bankrupted by something like this, just because their tongues have a mind of their own. Thankfully, this strange American law says that swearing is only illegal in public, which means you can still curse like a sailor when you aren’t in public and just hanging out with your squad.
8. It is illegal to pick up seaweed in New Hampshire’s beaches
In New Hampshire, it is super illegal to pick up seaweed on the beach at night. Doing so could land you in quite a tangle, thanks to another one of these strange American laws. This peculiar law was established with the intent of curbing the illegal harvesting of seaweed in the state, but has understandably been incredibly unsuccessful since there’s no way to enforce this stupidest of stupid laws in the US. At one point, the students at Granite State College named it “New Hampshire’s Dumbest Law”, and former state Rep. Max Abramson didn’t mince his words while expressing his feelings about it.
“The law is unenforceable, it’s silly, no other state has it, and absolutely no one knows why it’s on the books,” he rightly commented.
9. You can’t share your Netflix password in Tennessee
This law was passed in 2011 to stop the sale of Netflix login credentials by hackers who used to make a business out of these transactions. However, its ambit inadvertently also covers those of us who believe in keeping our friends and loved ones happy and entertained. This stupid law in the US is the perfect example of how the way a law is worded can have far reaching consequences for people like us who for whom sharing a Netflix password is the ultimate form of friendship. The number of weird laws in the US just goes to show that understanding legalese is never easy.
